I had a perplexing dream last year and it eluded me then as to why I woke up from something seemingly so pleasant all shivering and teary-eyed ; it eludes me still.
In my dream, it is too loud and I am engulfed by a bright blur of people.
I decide to break away and pursue a solitary pathway in the woods nearby when I notice I have no shoes on!
It is a beautiful winter afternoon though and I am convinced I shall find my lost shoes in the woods so I set out anyways.
I keep going on and on until I forget what I was looking for.
And like Robert Frost, I come to a point where two roads emerge in the woods.
The complexity now, is that they both look ALIKE ; equally sunny, equally beautiful, equally mysterious!
Where to go?
Bass iss aik sawal kay sath ankh khul gayi.
As much as I tried to just let it slide the two pathways kept invoking something inside of me ; a reality that perhaps I was unconsciously trying to turn a blind eye towards.
Perhaps like many before me, I too had arrived on the crossroads.
When faced with the diversion in the woods, with one signpost pointing North and the other South, how do you decide which way to follow?
And if you decide to pave your own path, who is your compass?
What is your compass?
Most importantly, where do you want to go?
I feel now, that I have done myself a lot of wrong.
For all these years,despite the qalma on my lips, I have always thought of the Afterlife as something in another dimension, jo jab aye gi tou dekhi jaye gi sort of a thing, what a hypocrite!
The Akhira to me was something I could always put on hold, like hey! sure karleingay us ka samaan bhi, I have got time.
But honey, we ain't got no time.
Tick, tock.
All the roads lead to only one Final Destination.
He awaits.
And you are going to meet Him.
When all the curtains you have conversed to the Beloved behind shall rise, what would that moment be like?
One can only but wonder.
What one can do in the meantime is , be prepared!
What one can do in the meantime is , be prepared!
Has it ever amazed you how each nimaz is nothing but a rehearsal for that final Meeting?
When you step away from the ground and on the janemaz , do you truly renounce this life?
Do you surrender?
Attar laments in his "Manteq al-Tayr";
"The way is open
But there is neither traveler
Nor guide"
Don't worry!
If you are willing to go, you will find a way.
Ask Allah to open up a way for you and He will.
I have found myself without a map countless times and as I mentioned this to a friend (you know who you are), she pointed out that a conversation is a two way street.
"Nimaz mein aap Allah sey baat kartay ho.
Magar us guftagoo ka jawab aap ko Quran mein milay ga"
How beautiful, MashaAllah!
Her words were what compelled me to reach up to the highest book shelf and swipe the dust off the Map I had always had but was completely blind to.
JazakAllah you-know-who-you-are!
JazakAllah you-know-who-you-are!
 |
| Guidance 101 |
Of the two equally alluring pathways, I have come to a conclusion that Shaiytan can blind us at times and make all that we do appear beautiful to ourselves, phir banda apnay aap sey muhabbat karnay lagta hai, apna aap sahi lagta hai aur baaki sab ghalat.
When things go according to plan, we glorify ourselves.
When they don't, ahista ahista, we begin to romanticize sadness, we eventually give up on hope and become to ourselves, "beautiful" disasters.
But fear not! When you can't trust yourselves with whats right and wrong , you can still trust Him! When you set your priorities right, everything else automatically falls in place.
Beg for Him to make the directions on the Map easy to decipher for you!
"and know that Allah cometh in between a man and his heart, and that it is He to Whom ye shall (all) be gathered." (Surah Al-Anfal, 24)
Beg for Him to come between you and your heart when a disease engulfs it.
Beg for Him to come between you and your heart when a disease engulfs it.
He is after all, The Turner of hearts!
Beg him to turn yours.
He crafted us individually and He, better than anyone else, understands how hard it is for us to give up certain things in life.
Someone you know may have an internal clock that wakes them up at Fajr, tadaa and you might find it hard to drag yourself to offer Jummah even.
Don't panic!
Don't despair!
He knows!
He acknowledges your effort!
The question is,
What of what you hold so dear in this life, love so much, are you willing to give up to seek the
Beloved's approval?
Ahh! Sometimes I wonder..
What would it be like, at the end of this arduous journey that is this wordly life, to make out your shadow from afar as we run to greet one another under the One Hundred Years long tree, InshaAllah!?
You coming?
Ya Allah! Become our intuition and guide us, for You will never lead us astray.
Ya Allah! Make beautiful to us, only that which is beautiful to you.
Ya Allah! From this life, let us take only that which sustains us.
Ya Allah! Let us give away ourselves bit by bit till only that of us remains that can weightlessly float away and up
Ameen
Ameen
